This Is My Stop
In the past 2 years, Peggy and I have done so much with Two Good Mums. We started out with a podcast, which then became a website, social media accounts we created, and we started to appear at conferences and during covid we did online workshops and presentations. In turn this led me to one of the proudest things I have ever done: releasing my book. I have had the amazing opportunity to attend round tables and create content for adoption agencies and even take part in the first ever birth parent day for National Adoption Week. There have been so many achievements for myself and Peggy since we created this ‘brand’, more so than I think we were aiming or hoping for at the start of this. We just wanted to tell our story and shine a light on how different contact can be and from the amazing feedback we have had, we know we have done what we set out to do.
So, what’s next? Well, for myself personally, I’m going to be saying goodbye to Two Good Mums, at least for now. I have always prided myself on my honesty, knowing that sharing how I feel is potentially helping another birth parent who feels isolated and alone, like nobody else knows how they are feeling. However, recently I’ve been feeling that way myself and it has been tough to know if it’s a positive or a negative; that’s something I’ll have to figure out for myself. It likely comes as no surprise to most that know my journey, that I am very accepting of what has happened with the boys. I’m now 16 years into this tale of forced adoption and for me, when I say it feels like a whole other lifetime ago, it doesn’t feel much like a metaphor. I feel disconnected from the girl who started this back in 2006 terrified that she didn’t know how to live without her son. So naïve and clueless to everything else yet to happen to her.
Taking part in events and meetings for birth parents has led me to realise that this disconnect I have, means that I don’t see the adoption sector being this big part of my future anymore. I hope that my book and the podcast continue to inspire people and bring comfort to people for many years to come, but for right now at least, I need to separate myself from something that feels like it no longer fits. I am hugely grateful for all the connections that I have made with birth parents, adopters, and professionals and the work that I have seen being done in the background is encouraging and exciting and I wish everyone I have had the pleasure of meeting well for the future.
This is my stop, it’s where I get off for now, on this long and ever winding road. It's time for me to go back to meeting the boys when we can all get together, speaking to them whenever they fancy a chat, and it would be great for myself and Peggy to just chat about the weather and what holiday plans we have again ha-ha. Mostly I’m going to be re focusing my energy on my little girl. My Ava. I think instead of being Two Good Mums, I just want to be a good Mum for a while, and I truly hope you can all understand.
Thank you so much everyone.